Play Russian Roulette With My Heart
by SeaSaw
Summary: Love is not always simple or kind. Another inspiration from SawManiac211's new fic - thank you for inspiring me! Sexual content, hints of sadism, inappropriate language...you get the drift. John/OC. Reviews always welcomed and loved!


_I wanna roll with him, a hard pair we will be. A little gambling is fun when you're with me. Russian Roulette is not the same without a gun. And baby when it's love if it's not rough it isn't fun. I'll get him hot, show him what I got. I'll get him hot, show him what I got. Can't read my, can't read my, no he can't read my poker face._

"Ow ow…that's not okay…for christ's sake John hurry!" it was one of the few times she gave John a hard time - working on traps together and especially ones that required heavy components. Since John wasn't capable of holding most of the heavy things up, it was up to her or anyone else available to do it (lately he had made it sort of a 'bonding' experience for the two of them).

"Just a few more adjustments. These things take time to work appropriately." He knew she had been standing with the heavy, flat sheet of metal for about 20 minutes. He hated to put undo strain on her, but he needed to be precise with hooking up the necessary mechanisms.

She sneered and groaned, feeling her knees shake and something crack in her back - that didn't sound good at all. "Yes and my whole upper body is going to require a readjustment if I don't become a fucking cripple first. Do you know how damn heavy this is?"

He stopped for a moment, annoyed at her snappy behavior and looked down at her, hearing her whimper when she realized she just bought herself more time holding this thing. "Watch your sassy behavior. I will only tolerate so much and you just spent my tolerance. Patience." Sometimes she had to learn to control her temper, though thankfully she wasn't as impulsive as Amanda, but all the same she could get under his skin with ease at times. Focusing on securing the plate to the mechanism, after another 10 minutes he was finally finished, stepping down "Alright, easily let it down. If it feels unsteady don't let go."

Groaning, she crouched down, feeling her knees pop a little with her hands still plastered on the underside. Slowly sliding her hands she realized that thankfully it was secure and jumped down off the table she was standing on. She leaned back, listening to the popping sounds as she stretched herself out from then painful position she had been standing in. A little agitated at him, she didn't say much more, really hating to be reprimanded - she was always one to struggle with authority and with Hoffman's appearance back into their lives she had gotten a bit more irritable.

John ignored her little temper tantrum for the moment and took her arm, pulling her back away from the table. He stepped over to the fuse box on the wall and pushed it to the 'ON' position. Smirking at her involuntary jump, he was satisfied with the results as the heavy metal slab crashed into the table beneath, clearly able to squeeze the life of some foolish soul that wouldn't follow the rules. Turning it back off, the slab cranked back up to the ceiling, Michelle following it with her eyes and he could see the troubled expression on her face before she shook her head and turned to face him.

"…so if I lost my hold on that thing I would be smashed to death, right?"

"I had faith in you. Clearly it was well placed."

"Next time you want to put someone's life on the line, how about you pick that asshole detective. I'm done." She sneered and turned her back to him, heading back down the hallway to head upstairs. John was stunned and clearly unable to really respond at the moment but at least he finally got to the root of what was the issue lately. She must have felt threatened by Hoffman's presence and insecure which wasn't a good combination for the type of person she was. He couldn't help being angry at her behavior though, shaking his head and heading to the door to turn off the light and head back upstairs. He would not tolerate disrespect from anyone.

When he got upstairs to look for her she had already retreated to try and take a cold shower and calm herself down, realizing her own behavior was unacceptable. Far be it from her to tell the man who was frustrated over it though. She stood under the spray of water with her hands on either side of her face before she brushed back the hair from her face as well as the stream of water. She turned around to turn up the temperature a bit since she was a little more at ease, closing her eyes and rolling her head from side to side, brushing her fingers over her collar bone and shoulders.

The curtain flew open with a vengeance and she startled as John grabbed her arm, forcefully pulling her from the shower. For a cancer patient he had remarkable strength. He spun her around before pulling her close to him and she winced, trying to cower away after she realized he was rather upset with her. Glaring at the young woman before him, John reached up, grabbing her face with one hand to force her to focus on him and every word he was about to speak. "Whatever it is that has you up in arms, don't you _ever_ talk to me that way again, do you understand me? I know Hoffman being here is making you uncomfortable but what did I tell you about trusting me? I wouldn't let that man hurt you again, do you understand?" He was frowning deeply at her, so much so that she could clearly see every line on his face. His hand was clasped tightly around her wrist and he shook her a bit to make sure she understood before she finally nodded 'yes', clearly nervous.

John was about to let her go when he couldn't help himself but to notice every beautiful curve and flaw in her body now that she stood here, completely vulnerable to him. Tilting his head to the side, his lips pursed tightly together as he studied her, feeling a strange arousal that occurred just because of her aggressive behavior earlier and his ability to control her. Before she could say anything to the man holding onto her wrist he pushed her out the door and drug her into the medical room, pushing her onto the bed. She didn't have time to react before she felt him restraining her wrists with leather straps. The last time she was in this situation in this room he injected her with a tranquilizer and she woke up with pistols and a shotgun pointed at her with some painful decisions to make and lessons to learn.

"John, wait! I'm sorry--"

He silenced her with his lips pressed hard against her own, her eyes going wide as his tongue slipped between her lips and brushed against her own. Breaking their lip lock, he grinned, brushing his fingers over her still wet cheek "I know you are. Now you're going to make it up to me." He watched the confusion wash over her face before he pressed his lips to hers again. She started to reciprocate when he broke the contact, pressing his lips to her wet collarbone, brushing his tongue against soft flesh to collect a small drop of water. It was as if she were holding her breath as his lips passed between her breasts, one hand coming up as fingers pressed into the soft globe and squeezed gently before he pinched her nipple just to get a reaction - and he got what he wanted. She gasped and arched her back a bit, John grinning through his gentle kisses, working his way down to her belly button. As his lips pressed to the delicate skin of her stomach, he brushed his fingers over the scars. His hand trailed down her thigh, switching to the inside before he very lightly brushed his fingers against her slit, feeling that she was already getting wet. He inserted one finger gently before pulling it out and brought his lips away from her skin, listening to her groan in agony. Stepping back from the table, he tilted his head to look her over - to John, she was perfect no matter how shy she was of showing herself to him; every little scar and imperfection on her body made her more entrancing to him. She groaned, turning her head to look at him as he lifted his shirt over his head and removed his pants and his boxers, still standing there quietly watching her. She pulled a little on the restraints and realized that he secured them as tight as he would if this were a trap - well, it sort of was; he was torturing her right now.

Climbing up on top of her, he situated himself between her legs, kneeling and bringing a hand to her cheek to guide her attention as he slipped two fingers into the heat between her legs. She gasped and peered into those blue eyes of his as he grinned a bit devilishly "You will look me in the eyes while we're intimate. If you look away I'll stop and leave you here over night just like this." He couldn't help but to chuckle at the horrified look she gave him before she frowned - oh she was a little angry at him, huh?

Removing his fingers, he took a moment while she was focused on him to bring those fingers up to his lips and slide them into his mouth. The groan she released seemed pained and aching, John grinning as he took hold of the length of himself and guided it into her wet slit. He pushed in to the hilt, watching her gasp and moan, shivering underneath of his body. He started out with a purpose, fast and hard, the sound of his flesh hitting her wet skin echoing in the room. He gripped tightly to her thighs to give himself leverage, pretty much fucking out all his frustrations with her. It was a good release not only for him when he was stressed keeping Hoffman and Michelle apart, but also for her since she seemed stressed over Hoffman's mere presence in their lives. He made sure she kept eye contact and could see the struggle writ across her features as she moaned, arching her back. Her fingers balled into a fist as she involuntarily pulled on the restraints, squeezing him with her thighs, her muscles flexing around his throbbing member that he plunged in to the hilt with each thrust. John groaned and growled, panting a bit as he thrusted fast and hard, grinning as he managed to illicit a rather surprising cry from his partner. She had to be careful, no matter how much hearing her scream got him going, he didn't need anyone getting involved - if they wanted to see him angry, they'd get that easily if that happened.

He finally leaned over her as he felt her convulsing with the first wave of pleasure that overwhelmed her body, bringing his face inches from her own. "I'm going to untie you. Behave yourself." grinning as he spoke, he moved his hand away from her thigh and with a very skilled flick of then wrist he undid both restraints. Her hands immediately came up and he smiled as they wrapped around his neck, her legs coming up to wrap around his waist. Without his coaxing she leaned up, pressing her lips to his own, taking him by surprise but all it managed to do was get him excited as he brought his hands underneath of her body and grabbed hold of her butt, pushing her hips hard into his own, thrusting violently. She cried out into his mouth before they broke the contact between their lips, John thrusting as hard and fast as he could. She was trembling aggressively underneath of him as they both started to reach their climax, John watching the flash in her hazel eyes intently. He grinned as she couldn't help but to close her eyes, her nails digging into his back and dragging down them, leaving red trails of blood behind. The stinging pain aroused John and he growled loudly into her ear, dropping his head before picking it up, bringing one hand around to grab her thigh and squeeze. "That's my girl." he groaned and then closed his eyes tightly, grunting and dropping his head as he felt her muscles clenching tightly around the length of him.

"Oh god yes, John!" she cried out, unable to prevent herself from doing so, tossing her head back and arching her back as John thrusted through both of their orgasms and if she wasn't mistaken, she heard him whisper her name. John shuddered as she did, covered in sweat and her skin was now dry from the cold water of the shower earlier. He brought a hand up to her face, gently stroking her cheek and looking into her eyes to what he felt was the depths of her very soul.

They managed to make it to John's bed as she lay with her head on his chest, listening to the murmur of his heartbeat not nearly as strong as her own or any healthy person for that matter. John ran his fingers through the soft red strands of her hair and lightly trailed his fingers down her back, feeling goosebumps following the trail of his fingertips. He smiled, content with how things had been going lately - she was helping with traps, working hard, and satisfying urges John had ignored for quite some time. He also had the opportunity to show tenderness to someone, even if for brief moments after they were intertwined in an act that only lovers normally engaged.

For now she was ignoring the wandering, nagging questions that raced through her mind however she was unable to quiet the nagging of her confused heart. She closed her eyes, fingers trailing lightly down his chest through curly, white hairs, trying to silence her mind and heart if only for now. This moment was not what she'd call perfect, but feeling so close to someone was all she ever really wanted since the tragedies that befell her. Not only did John satisfy her physical urges, but he satisfied the emotional ones. He knew she wanted someone to need her and he wanted to at least give that to her for as long as he was able to.

Kissing the top of her head, he smiled as she tilted her head up to look at him, bringing a hand up and brushing his thumb over her cheek. He didn't need to say that he found her beautiful, entrancing, and satisfying - his look said it all. As her head tilted back down he felt her breathing slow down as she tried to rest, satisfying the emotional needs that even Jigsaw needed from time to time by being wrapped up in his arms as he too drifted off.


End file.
